We scheduled ourselves a whirlwind fall and this past week was the middle of it. I started out feeling out of sorts after the day I referenced last week where I slept for 20 out of 24 hours. Immediately following that I got insomnia in addition to my regularly scheduled nausea. It felt like a different life than the week before being with some of the most important people in my life in one of my favorite places.
I’m always hungry during chemo because nausea prevents me from eating to satiety, and as soon as I’m able my body wants to make up for the missed calories. This week that desire to catch up never went away and I felt like a hunger monster. This cycle is one of the things I find so dizzying about biweekly chemo – my appetite always feeling like a reaction out of my control. My tongue is feeling more numb and my sense of taste is more affected by chemo lately so I find myself craving the big flavors of grease and salt and spice and sugar to compensate. I’d like to try approaching my nutrition more mindfully next cycle to see if it helps reduce the gustatory rollercoaster.
There are not a lot of cancer perks, but today was full of them. In the morning I was on a panel at a local high school, speaking to students interested in health care careers. I really enjoyed sharing my story. The kids asked me a lot of follow up questions about what it’s like, and I was glad to be able to honestly answer them. I made some great connections with my fellow panel members and left with invites to visit a colorectal cancer lab and to get in the loop for more opportunities to share my story. I went straight from there to a follow up session for my cancer song. We finally have the structure and lyrics settled. I recorded my vocal part in the chorus and was surprised by how much I liked my playback. I finished the day so grateful to have the time to pursue these kinds of opportunities. I already feel secure in my legacy and this is a rewarding addition to it.