Weekly Update #24

It’s the week before my next scan, which means my anxiety is up. I generally don’t spend a lot of time thinking and worrying about the scan itself, my worries tend to present themselves in other ways. This weekend I found myself interrogating my husband on what he planned to buy at the grocery store before suddenly gasping and saying, “I don’t know why I am doing this.” We ended up having a good laugh about it and I’m trying to be gentle with him and those around me in the mean time.

I am still feeling frustrated with the disconnect between my energy levels and my abilities. My energy is high again, but between a pulled abdominal muscle, sciatica, and a spasming neck muscle there’s not much movement I can do that’s safe. Even the stretches for the latter two ailments irritate the former.

This week I have had two exciting opportunities fall into my lap. I’m going to keep them close to my chest for a bit longer because they’re so exciting that revealing them feels like it might make them disappear. It continues to be both humbling and fulfilling to have opportunities to share my story.

5 thoughts on “Weekly Update #24

  1. Sorry to hear about the energy/ability disconnect… it’s frustrating isn’t it. I had my 9 month since starting treatment scan last week and got results Wednesday – cancer still there, no significant changes to liver mets, but no sign of anything anywhere else – so stable. I wasn’t as consciously anxious this time, then the 6 month scan, but did find myself being very mercurial… both doing a lot of advance planning as well as avoiding making some decisions until I got the results. Sending positive mojo for the scans next week, and hope you get some relief from the physical discomfort/pain. Looking forward to hearing more about your opportunities when you feel comfortable to share.

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